


Killing Death

by WildAdapted



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-20
Updated: 2011-08-20
Packaged: 2017-10-22 20:45:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/242397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WildAdapted/pseuds/WildAdapted
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kenny Ponders about Deaths.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Killing Death

**Author's Note:**

> PS: This fic is hella old. Just a repost from FF.net.

Kenny sat at his desk. He was bored. VERY bored. Stan and Kyle had gone off into their own world as usual that only included the two of them. When they got to this point in their conversation only a very loud yell from an authority figure can snap them back to reality. And they said they weren't gay. Not gay my ass.

Anyway, Kenny simply sat as his desk, waiting for homeroom to end so he and the rest of his tenth grade class can start, and Stan and Kyle would shut up. He ran a hand through his dirty blond hair. I need a shower he thought as he un-gingerly sniffed his armpit. "Ugh…" He shook his head, trying to banish the stink from his nostrils. He gazed around the room with the same boredom etched in his eyes. Bebe and Wendy were arguing about shoes, Craig stole Tweek's coffee again, Token and Clyde were talking about the latest game Token's parents bought him, Jimmy and Timmy were communicating in their own language, and Butters was drawing Hello Kitty with some random student from another class.

It seemed that everyone was paired off. And he, Kenny, was left all alone. Even Butters' was with someone. He knew it was just Homeroom but he couldn't help but feel…..lonely. With a sigh Kenny stood and left the classroom in search of solitude. He had fifteen minuets before Homeroom was over so he had time to smoke a cigarette and get back without being marked late.

He snuck outside, behind the trashcans of the school, and pulled out his pack of filtered Marlboro's. He lit the end and let put it to his lips, the smoke filled his lungs, calming him. Not a single person knew that he smoked. He always made sure not to get the scent off his clothes, and even when he didn't everyone assumed it was from his father. His fear of dying ended after he died from the muscle disease, by smoking he felt he was asking Death to show up, just so he can kill him. Killing Death, Kenny let out a hollow laugh at this thought. It's not like anyone would even notice or care if or when he died. Stan and Kyle might mourn him but they'd always have each other and they didn't need him. His parents might also mourn him but they'll realize that without an extra mouth to feed they'd have more money. Not a single person in South Park would even notice if he suddenly choked on his cigarette and died. But these thoughts didn't make Kenny sad. At least not as sad most people would be. He smiled at the thought of all the good his death would bring. His family would have some money, Stan and Kyle would end up being even closer friends, and Death would have another victim.

Kenny stubbed out his cigarette on the trash can. He had five minuets to get back to class. He didn't run but calmly walked into the room. As he sat down at his desk, one person, who was not there before, turned to him. "Where were you?"

"Outside." Kenny said, with a sigh.

"Were you….." the fat boy paused. "never mind."

Kenny laughed. "Yea, I was.

"You're gonna die again."

"So. What do you suddenly care about me?

The boy's round face flushed "No! If you died then we'd have less poor people in South Park."

"Maybe….but you know I'll just be back the next day."

"…..What if you died and…..didn't come back?"

"What if I didn't? Would you cry at my funeral?" Kenny grinned.

More blushing "No…why would I cry for you?"

"Come on Eric…We're BFFs. I'd cry if you died."

"Well…I'm not a pussy…."

"Whatever you say, tubby."

"'EH! Don't call me fat!"

"I like your fat…makes you soft. If I died right now…I'd fall on you and you'd be my soft pillow." His grin widened at the thought.

"Don't talk like that. I swear, Kenny, if you die today….I'll kill you tomorrow."

"Duly noted. I'll take that into account if I die."

"Good." Eric fidgeted for a moment. "Kenny…"

"Yes?"

"Would you really cry if I died?"

"Sure, I would. I'd cry tears of joy." He laughed.

Eric huffed and mumbled under his breath "Fine then…..I won't die until after you die permanently."

"Aw that's sweet." Kenny said, leaning back in his chair.

Eric blushed even deeper "'Ey! Shut up Kenny!"

The Bell sounded, signaling students to disperse from Homeroom and head to first period. Kenny grabbed his bag, still grinning, and swung it over his shoulder. He leaned towards Eric and quietly said "I'll make sure to kill death before it can get either of us." He pecked Eric on the cheek and turned and left the room before the larger boy could respond.

Eric stared for a moment at Kenny's seat, as his brain registered what had just happened. He suddenly stood and ran after the skinny boy, his face beet red, "GODDAMMIT Kenny!" But Kenny was already at the other end of the hallway, laughing his ass off.


End file.
